Across the Divide

My (adult) daughter and I went to see my dad yesterday. He's nearly 89, has late-stage Alzheimer's and lives in a care home a 40 minute drive away. I try to get over for an hour or so every fortnight, although it's more for me than him, as he doesn't remember my visits and forgets I was there by the time I've signed out at reception.

He does appear to get some comfort from our presence though. Yesterday was particularly strange. Dad has a habit of getting stuck in a loop and he'll repeat the same words, sentence or idea over and over for a few minutes until he spins off into a new sequence. Sometimes he knows who I am; mostly he confuses me with mum. Yesterday he was at peace. I was there, he was there, Clare was there and he was at peace and happy. He told us he'd died several times and come back again but that in the end it didn't matter as he was at peace. He was holding our hands and he was frightened, but it was all OK.

At this point, both Clare and I had shivers down our spines! He's looking wide-eyed across the lounge at things we can't see - his eyesight isn't good these days, but he seemed to be seeing something. And he tells us that all his brothers and sisters are there and that makes him happy. He's one of the youngest of a very large family and I think there are only four of them left.

And then he slept. And Clare and I wondered if he'd wake up again or whether that was it. I like to think he'd stepped very briefly close to the veil, that he's standing closer to it every day, and one day - when he's ready - he'll take that final step across.

Love you, dad xx

Aunty Debbie's Advice Column, part 6 of the trilogy

Sixth instalment, eh? Who knew this advice lark could get so exciting? My first agony column (and yes, it really is agony most of the time) was waaay back in 2013. Bad writing has of course been around for much longer than that, but I like to think I've helped so many people better themselves over the years.

I thought it was worth pulling together my occasional agony-aunt column I've written on my monthly post over at AuthorsElectric. You can read more here ... and there are links to the earlier posts at the end.

It's all a bit tongue in cheek. For those lacking in my admittedly offbeat sense of humour, don't take it too seriously!

Nantwich Bookshop & Coffee Lounge

So I'm now in our local independent bookshop! If you're out and about in Nantwich in Cheshire, I thoroughly recommend you visit this amazing place where you can not only buy books, but eat an all-day breakfast, drink coffee and eat cake too! And all in a medieval timber-framed building with an attic they let you explore ... 

The End of 2022

2022 was not one of my better years. I think I achieved very little in the grand scheme of things and certainly no writing of any importance at all. But I have been blogging the story of the dental implant surgery I had last month. It wasn't a good period in my life - it still isn't - and I wanted to help anybody else considering the options I had.

You can read more here. This is a separate page on this blog that I will keep updating until I get to the end of this journey, but I'm keeping it off the menu tabs above as it's not directly related to my writing catalogue - and not everybody wants to see my X-rays!